Our fellow professional godbotherer, the esteemed Rev. Dr. Pat Robertson, has made headlines of late claiming the Haitians made a pact with the devil during their revolution against Napoleon III. That their revolution took place decades earlier is an understandable mistake on the good Doctor's part. Most Americans (and he is no exception) are severely (and tragically) disabled when it comes to even the simplest understanding of history and the historical context.
In any case, we are writing to express our considerable dismay that so many people have ridiculed him for referring to a Satanic pact. Clearly these people have no personal experience with The Devil themselves and have no business making such irresponsible and ignorant comments. The Doctor, on the other hand, does have considerable experience to speak of such a pact, given that he has made several such pacts with regard to himself and on behalf of his various investments over the years.
It may surprise those who are not Christian to learn that The Devil is a peculiarly powerful and much beloved Christian Deity, absolutely integral to their worship practices. There are, in fact, three Christian deities - Jehovah, The Devil and, of course, Hypocrisy - deities we list in order of ascending importance to the Faithful. Many Christians, of course, noisily disagree that there are three and insist on worshipping only one. Inevitably the one they choose to elevate is Hypocrisy.
Oh, by the way, please note that the enlarged bit of his heart referred to in the link above and here was successfully removed at the time of his pact-making and his heart is now back down to (for him) a manageable size.
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